1. Endless Tacos
9. Giant anthropomorphic eggplant that :censored:s grenades
The eggplant starts off strong, but tires which, combined with increased fecal output from so many Tacos eventually leads to the vegetable self exploding on one of its own grenades; meanwhile the Tacos just keep on coming.
5. Sinking depression of remembering Robin Williams killed himself
You know who'd be good in a film about the ridiculousness of the world losing its collective :censored: over a dead ape?
Oh, yeah. That happened didn't it.
3. PBJ the size of Maine
6. Bill Belichik in an ironclad warship
Even with the inordinate size of the foe, it's lack of offense combined with the relentlessness of 'Ole Bill means that he wins. Eventually.
2. The sinking depression of living in Trump's America
If one REALLY, REALLY tries, one can avoid thinking about Trump; whilst if Goro is onto you you cannot avoid him.
1. The sacred moose leg of Flin Flon, MB
9. Accidental curly fry
Every time you receive an accidental curly fry it is down to the moose leg using its sacred power to do benevolent good and spread happiness.
5. Outback's new 3-Point bloomin' onion
13. The TV Guide Channel
The sheer ridiculousness of the onion induces desire, but one that I know would be followed by regret. The channel may not be as exciting, but it's solid, wholesome and reliable.
3. Nostalgia Bower
6. Breakfast for dinner
All day breakfast is the goddamned best.
2. THX sound before movies
10. A tangled slinky
The sound comes and goes, only to subsequently return. Once tangled, the slinky is gone forever.
1. Anti Trump bald eagle
9. Ancient Aliens Robot Osiris
The Eagle that gave us one of the greatest gifs of all time cannot go down yet.
4. Buffalo Sabres' skate-wearing buffalo
5. Team Israel WBC mascot
Ludicrous as both are, the mensch on the bench wins because it actually came to fruition, and was not just a concept.
3. Russell, MB goalie beer thief
11. Freaky Mr. Rogers statue
The pilfering goal tender is so drunk that to him the statue looks normal, and it is able to exert none of its freaky influence upon him.
2. OG Aaron Burr
10. Tom Brady's sex toy
Ridiculously comic as the dildo is, Burr absolutely doesn't care and just shoots it and moves on.
9. 1974 Winnebago
16. KellyAnne Conway's next true statement
I cannot in good conscience do anything which could possibly make Kellyanne Conway feel good about being Kellyanne Conway.
4. Chimp biker gang - Darwin's disciples
Hard as this is to do, Detroit is one of the few cities that has seen and dealt with a heck of a lot weirder and more intimidating than the Chimps.
6. Real life sharknado
14. Russian dash Cam
I find it impossible to improve upon @nash61's reasoning behind this
10. Righteous indignation of Keith Olbermann
15. Wonder sauna hot pants
Entertaining, and correct, as Olbermann is, I fully understand the indignation. The hot pants meanwhile? I have no idea what this mystifying :censored: is, and I really want to know more.