NHL 15-16: wife-beaters, adulterers, cokeheads, rapists, pill-poppers, AND METHODISTS

[CS85]

6 minutes ago, the admiral said:

Seems to have been debunked based on the fact that the Saturday night Kings game is always the last night of the circus trip and the Hawks are on a charter getting the hell home as soon as possible. Wouldn't have been enough time for Kane to go to "a popular bar" and stroll into a women's bathroom without reproach.

 

Everything concerning it has been deleted as well.  No idea what to think, but I hope it was false.

[Kevin W.]

The Hawks' charter flight (the only airline known to fly the Blackhawks) which was the only flight by that airline out of LAX, left LAX less than two hours after the game in question was over.

https://www.reddit.com/r/hockey/comments/421nyr/announcement_regarding_patrick_kane_allegations/cz6xh7a

That pretty much proves that the encounter couldn't have happened. If there were less than two hours between the end of the game and wheels up, Kane wouldn't have wasted time at some bar.

[The_Admiral]

Someone posted a tweet where a girl chided her friend for not chatting up Toews at brunch in Chicago the next morning. Probably for the best; Toews would have gripped her with his strong soft hands and, I dunno, talked about his coin collection or something.

[T-ROY]

3 hours ago, FGM13 said:

Let's go burn down Patty Kane's house, shall we?

Jumping the gun, I see

[LMU]

2 hours ago, the admiral said:

Seems to have been debunked based on the fact that the Saturday night Kings game is always the last night of the circus trip and the Hawks are on a charter getting the hell home as soon as possible. Wouldn't have been enough time for Kane to go to "a popular bar" and stroll into a women's bathroom without reproach.

That and she says that she told Kane that it was Sunday and she had work the next day. As much detail that she threw in you'd think she'd get the day right.

Also seems bizarre that she kept it quiet for more than a year only to reveal the whole thing in such detail on LiveJournal of all places.

[The_Admiral]

Oh brudder, turns out this whole thing might just be an entry in what appears to be a disturbingly large canon of Jonathan Toews/Patrick Kane erotic fan fiction.

[Kevin W.]

The Twitter account of one of the people involved in this nonsense reads like every stereotype of SJWs ever. There was one tweet where she decried anyone using the flight plan evidence as "gross" as if finding evidence that proves he couldn't have possibly been in the place they claim he was is somehow wrong. Oy...

[The_Admiral]

 

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Jessica‏@bebetterbison

Compassion and empathy are a thing. Stop to think of the human being, before you scurry away to 'prove' anything #sa #rape #kane

 

 

 

 

 

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a thing.

 

 

No! I mean, yes, obviously, but no! And on top of that, they're two discrete things!

[LMU]

Stop to think of the human being but don't you dare stop to think of the human being whose life could be impacted/ruined by false accusations.

 

I also stumbled upon the Twitter account of the alleged author (it's linked in the Reddit page with the original flight data). She seemed too busy bragging about all the male haters she's blocked for pointing out the iceberg-sized hole in her story than starting any victim advocacy campaign.

[Sport]

The Blue Jackets decided to have some fun today and held practice at the outdoor skating rink that's across the street from the arena. Renee Bourque accidentally (or maybe on purpose, who knows?) collided with Tortorella and now our :censored:ing coach is too injured to coach at the next game. Even our coach is injured. 

 

This :censored:ing team never ceases to amaze me. 

[IceCap]

Tortorella not being behind the bench can only improve Columbus' chances.

[Brass]

I'll be seeing the Beej in Boston tomorrow. The one game a year I can attend due to outrageously high ticket prices.

[The_Admiral]

So apparently here's the deal with the Kane thing, as best I can tell. Way down in dark corners of the internet where men fear to tread, some people like to write fan fiction about Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane having sex with each other. Why do they do this? I don't know. Why do we come here and talk about sports logos? Why does anyone do anything? The writing quality of this erotica makes a Tijuana Bible read like Dostoyevsky, but that's beside the point. When Kane was accused of rape this summer, this upset a lot of people, as we all know, and led to a Great Schism among people who like to write fan fiction about Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane having sex with each other: those who could no longer masturbate to thoughts of him with the knowledge that he is less than an ideal person (masturbating to Toews is still okay), and those who could, a logical extension of the divide that comparatively normal hockey-watching people have expressed since August.

 

Being that this story was posted to a blog dedicated to hockerotica (I don't know whether that portmanteau has any currency in the community already, I hope it doesn't, not because I want the credit for it but because the community shouldn't exist), it's reasonable to believe that between the site of the post and the, how you say, illustrative nature of the prose with Kane's "soft, strong hands" and magical bathrooms that don't have women walking in within ten-minute timespans, that this was not so much directed at Kane himself as it was a salvo against the people who haven't given in to peer pressure and abandoned Kane. With everything that went down this summer, this should have arisen sooner, and in a place considerably less obscure than a LiveJournal where girls (and I'm sure guys) get off to poorly written stories of NHLers doing one another.

 

Even before someone did the detective work for us, the setting of a bar the day after the circus-trip Kings game rang false for those of us who have been Hawks radio listeners and remember that late-night Kings game as the one where there's basically no postgame show because everyone has to make a charter and finally get home to their families after two weeks, including Thanksgiving, of traversing Western Canada and California. Any sort of bad behavior in that timeframe would have to come on Thanksgiving Day or Friday night after the Ducks matinee, with Wednesday night being the trip from Northern California to Southern California, where the Hawks spend Thanksgiving, and Saturday night being the flight home.

Basically, I've learned far more about a bizarre Tumblr/LiveJournal subculture than I have about Patrick Kane. I've also learned that people can care about flight tracking an awful lot.

[Cosmic]

... and thanks for bringing all of us along on your journey of discovery, admiral. 

[The_Admiral]

Oh, just be glad I didn't, uh...cite my sources. I could ruin this thread faster than Tank talking politics. I could scar this board for life.

[RyanMcD29]

2 hours ago, the admiral said:

I've also learned that people can care about flight tracking an awful lot.

Man, you'll love college football coaching rumors based on flight tracking

[HedleyLamarr]

7 hours ago, the admiral said:

I could scar this board for life.

You did enough of that the other night....

[chcarlson23]

Basically to sum up the last, oh I don't know ten pages, Patrick Kane's soft hands got him a 2015 Cup, a 26 game point streak, 2 rape accusations (because that's all these are),

and lots of people hating on him. (Including myself... But those are mostly for Hockey reasons  )

[LMU]

The Kings with a stunning, come-from-behind victory against the Sharks.  Something about this seems familiar...

[habsfan1]

One step closer, baby...