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1 minute ago, Logomaster2000 said:

An excellent observation, but I am very, very cheap.

 

Then get a job, or find someone who is wearing one that will fit you and steal it off of their back.  If you're as skinny as you describe, I would recommend arming yourself if you do this.  A chainsaw would work.

 

Cut up the jersey, or simply go without.  I can't tell if this is a serious question, but I'm really not sure what answer you're really expecting to receive.

 

Things cost money.  You want something (a proper fitting jersey) that you're not willing to spend money on, so you're in a bind.  Posting on a message board isn't going to fix it.

"The views expressed here are mine and do not reflect the official opinion of my employer or the organization through which the Internet was accessed."

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cut off your arms below the elbow (might need a friend to help with the second one) and then saw have the friend saw you in half under the belly button.  It'll suck for your sex life (though if you're as cheap as you say it is, I can't imagine you're attracting much) and for general mobility, but if wearing that jersey is a priority, then you need to be prepared to make sacrifices.

 

"The views expressed here are mine and do not reflect the official opinion of my employer or the organization through which the Internet was accessed."

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Find someone with a jersey too big and trade.

Disclaimer: If this comment is about an NBA uniform from 2017-2018 or later, do not constitute a lack of acknowledgement of the corporate logo to mean anything other than "the corporate logo is terrible and makes the uniform significantly worse."

 

BADGERS TWINS VIKINGS TIMBERWOLVES WILD

POTD (Shared)

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I mean this is the nicest way possible, but the OP must be an interesting-looking fellow. The arms are too short, but his shoulders almost fit through the neck hole? On a size small jersey? I think the only hope is to wear a proper-fitting shirt in the same color underneath, and maybe it won't be immediately apparent that your butter is spread over too much bread.

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3 hours ago, BringBackTheVet said:

 

Then get a job, or find someone who is wearing one that will fit you and steal it off of their back.  If you're as skinny as you describe, I would recommend arming yourself if you do this.  A chainsaw would work.

A chainsaw wouldn't work in this case if you don't want to get blood all over the jersey which would be murder to clean off.

 

I'd recommend going the Kim Jong-Nam route.

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I - no, the COMMUNITY needs to know how this ended.  Did you wear the too small jersey?   Did you get just-right jersey?  Did you alter the too-small jersey?  Did you mutilate your body to make the too-small jersey fit just right?  Did you murder anyone with a chainsaw?  DON'T LEAVE US HANGING LIKE THIS!

"The views expressed here are mine and do not reflect the official opinion of my employer or the organization through which the Internet was accessed."

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2 hours ago, BringBackTheVet said:

I - no, the COMMUNITY needs to know how this ended.  Did you wear the too small jersey?   Did you get just-right jersey?  Did you alter the too-small jersey?  Did you mutilate your body to make the too-small jersey fit just right?  Did you murder anyone with a chainsaw?  DON'T LEAVE US HANGING LIKE THIS!

Hear, hear!

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But you said the whole thing was tight and too short - please tell me your belly button was exposed and you paired the sweater with short jorts. 

"The views expressed here are mine and do not reflect the official opinion of my employer or the organization through which the Internet was accessed."

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