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The Cubs: What if?


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Although magazine articles usually don't get their own topic, I figured this article was "special". Cubs: What if? is an article in the SI magazine about what theoretically would have happened if a security guard would have stopped Bartman from interfering with the ball. According to the article...

  • The Cubs will make it to the world series.
  • Bartman will be a national hero along with the security guard.
  • Barack Obama will never be president, or even Senator.
  • Tim McCarver will become a legendary announcer. :wacko:
  • 2003 Cubs-Yanks will be the best World Series ever (7 games).
  • The ending is too surprising to post here. I'll let someone else reveal it. So has anyone else read it?

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Yeah, sorry. Bartman had nothing to do with that loss. Or any of that other stuff they listed. I've moved on. How about "what if the best-record-in-NL 2008 Cubs could have won a playoff game?"

Dempster can't handle getting the Game 1 start, gives up a grand slam and it's all downhill from there. Wow, sounds like today.

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Cubs: What if? is an article in the SI magazine about what theoretically would have happened if a security guard would have stopped Bartman from interfering with the ball.

He didn't interfere in the first place; it was out of play.

What if Alex Gonzalez didn't make an error? What if Dusty didn't leave Mark Prior in too long? What if Dusty, renowned players' manager, got everyone together for a conference to calm everybody down, especially the noticably perturbed Alou and Prior? What if Dusty didn't put Kyle Farnsworth in the game to suck up the joint as he has done his entire career? Blame the right parties.

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I fail to see how Steve Bartman not catching the ball prevents Obama's political foes for the Senate seat from 1) having an acrimonious divorce that spills over into the papers, 2) having an acrimonious divorce prompted by the husband asking his wife, aka Seven of Nine to perform sex acts with him in public (oh yes, and the papers found out about THAT too), and 3) Being a deranged carpet bagging lunatic respectively. I know, butterfly effect and all, but really?

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Alex Gonzalez has to love Steve Bartman. Imagine what he would have gone through if people didn't get so mad about a foul ball.

Yeah, that polesmoker's gotten off easier than a nymphomaniac. It was him, him, him, and we're blaming the dumbass with the walkman on.

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Alright, here's a weird one for you:

I happen to live on the same street as Steve Bartman. Well, he moved (probably out of fear) after "the incident" and only his parents live there now. He's an insanely nice guy and was even my tee-ball coach one year when i was younger. He's a die-hard Cubs fan and its pretty sad to see what has happened to his life. The night of that game, and the next day, there were news trucks up and down my street trying to get interviews. It was ridiculous.

So yeah, I'll keep defending him. There were 15 people around him reaching for that ball. Moises Alou reacted like an absolute :censored:, and Gonzales flubbed the next out. Prior choked, and they had two more games after that one, needing to win one. Ridiculous

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Although magazine articles usually don't get their own topic, I figured this article was "special". Cubs: What if? is an article in the SI magazine about what theoretically would have happened if a security guard would have stopped Bartman from interfering with the ball. According to the article...

  • The Cubs will make it to the world series.
  • Bartman will be a national hero along with the security guard.
  • Barack Obama will never be president, or even Senator.
  • Tim McCarver will become a legendary announcer. :wacko:
  • 2003 Cubs-Yanks will be the best World Series ever (7 games).
  • The ending is too surprising to post here. I'll let someone else reveal it. So has anyone else read it?

I started reading it but wasn't interested enough to finish, although the eagle and Blagojevich's hair was good for a chuckle at least. I'm surprised SI devoted that much space to something that will engage few other than Chicagoans and hardcore Cubs fans.

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Alex Gonzalez has to love Steve Bartman. Imagine what he would have gone through if people didn't get so mad about a foul ball.

Imagine if Cubs fans weren't retarded.

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Alex Gonzalez has to love Steve Bartman. Imagine what he would have gone through if people didn't get so mad about a foul ball.

Imagine if Cubs fans weren't retarded.

Imagine if you weren't a stereotypical assh0le.

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