Critical Thinker Posted July 1, 2014 Share Posted July 1, 2014 [i stole the idea for this from another board, but I hope you like it ]NCAA Announces New FBS Football Tournament'Playouts' to Begin this SeasonIndianapolis, IN.- In addition to the highly anticipated college football playoffs this season, the NCAA has just announced a new post-season tournament to serve alongside the playoffs, as well as the bowl series.“I am pleased to announce that beginning this fall, the NCAA will hold the FBS Playouts, a post-season tournament to increase our revenu… I mean, expand the opportunities for our member institutions,” said NCAA President Mark Emmert. “This new and exciting tournament will give many of these institutions yet another opportunity for national exposer of their names across a country so eager to spend money on foo… I mean, enjoy college football.”But what will this tournament look like? According to Emmert, this tournament is a unique, novel approach on how fans follow college football. “The Playouts will be a very simple concept to understand,” he continued. “It will be a 16 team post-season tournament, where the winner of each game is eliminated, and the loser advances on. The team which loses all their games will be the FBS Playout National Champion. To ensure only the highest quality of entertainment is reached in determining a Playout champion, only the worst teams in the FBS will qualify for this exclusive sixteen team field.”As anticipated by the NCAA, the Playouts will be an event that fans won’t be able to hear enough of. In fact, earlier this week, the Playouts had reached an exclusive agreement with a willing media outlet. The Playouts will covered solely by Critical Thinker on sportslogos.net. “We are excited to have reached a deal with Critical Thinker,” as Emmert continued. “We are confident this media outlet will give us and our member institutions the exposer to maximize profits.” One of the biggest questions still lingered, however: will the Playouts truly be comprised of the worst teams in the FBS? As explained by Emmert, the CAROTS system (Critical Thinker’s Arbitrary Rankings of Terrible Schools) will determine which teams make the final field of sixteen. “It can’t be any worse than what we have now, so why not?” he reasoned. The CAROTS system will first take an automatic qualifier (AQ) from each of the ten conferences, which shall be the conference’s mathematically worst team. Next, CAROTS shall select the next six mathematically worst teams in the FBS, with no regards to conference affiliation, which will be known as “at-large” selections.Once the field of sixteen has been set, the teams will be divided into one of four geographic regions, North, South, East, and West. However, just like the NCAA’s already popular ‘March Madness’ tournament, no team will be placed in the geographic region where it actually belongs. “This is for the benefit of the institution,” explained Emmert. “Sending a school to a different part of the country gets its name and reputation out to where it wouldn’t have been heard otherwise.” Teams which qualify will be known as the Sucking 16. Games will be played on the campus sites of the mathematically inferior team (as determined by CAROTS). After the first round is complete, the losers will advance to the Egregious 8. This round will be played on neutral sites, with the locations being released at a later date. The losers of the Egregious 8 will continue on to the Futile 4, before the worst two teams battle for the ultimate prize: the 2015 NCAA Playout National Champion. Games will take place starting in mid-December, to end in January.To hype up this tournament, a pre-season poll will be release before the end of the month, and media days for each conference, featuring appearances by each school’s head coach, will follow. Be sure to follow Critical Thinker for more!The NCAA Playouts Committee is always willing to take fans suggestions, to improve the quality and entertainment of the event. Any comments or suggestions will be welcomed. Fans are encouraged to post their thoughts below. It's _____________ and Toledo still sucks.[insert time here] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy! Posted July 1, 2014 Share Posted July 1, 2014 There's three minutes of my life I won't ever get back. "I secretly hope people like that hydroplane into a wall." - Dennis "Big Sexy" Ittner POTD - 7/3/14 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waltere Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 1 hour ago, BringBackTheVet said: sorry sweetie, but I don't suck minor-league d CCSLC Post of the day September 3rd 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rams80 Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 True story: The NCAA tried to demote the MAC to I-AA in the early 1980s. It actually was a I-AA league for one season. Just posting this here. On 8/1/2010 at 4:01 PM, winters in buffalo said: You manage to balance agitation with just enough salient points to keep things interesting. Kind of a low-rent DG_Now. On 1/2/2011 at 9:07 PM, Sodboy13 said: Today, we are all otaku. "The city of Peoria was once the site of the largest distillery in the world and later became the site for mass production of penicillin. So it is safe to assume that present-day Peorians are descended from syphilitic boozehounds."-Stephen Colbert POTD: February 15, 2010, June 20, 2010 The Glorious Bloom State Penguins (NCFAF) 2014: 2-9, 2015: 7-5 (L Pineapple Bowl), 2016: 1-0 (NCFAB) 2014-15: 10-8, 2015-16: 14-5 (SMC Champs, L 1st Round February Frenzy) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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