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Everything posted by RockyTopper

  1. I played full contact from 4th grade to my freshman year of high school. I played offensive and defensive line most of the time, so the risk of "bell ringing" hits was low, but I did get absolutely rocked on multiple occasions. Elementary school kids (middle/high school too, but absolutely younger) shouldn't be getting battered when their bodies and brains are rapidly developing. Honestly glad that I quit when I did.
  2. Waiting for a Boston sports writer to cry about this being a "Roger Goodell conspiracy" against the poor poor underdog Pats organization...
  3. I wouldn't give up a day of my life to see the Titans win it all. Why? My dad has been a Vikings fan since he was 9 years old and watched them lose SB IV on TV (he became a Vikings fan because he loved how their helmets looked). That was 50 years ago. He doesn't even watch the NFL nowadays. I'd still rather see him get to see the Vikings win if I had the choice.
  4. The Oakland Raiders of San Francisco (en Route to Las Vegas)
  5. Jeff Fisher sits in his den as the game ends. He picks up his 1999 AFC championship ring. "To get there and come up short, I know how it feels. After all," He sets the ring down and looks at a photo of himself on the sidelines in a Rams jacket. He smirks under his graying mustache. "I got you there. You knew you'd regret firing me someday. Today's that day, I guess." He turns off the TV, goes to his kitchen, and microwaves a mediocre TV dinner for the fourth straight night.
  6. Tom Brady is the greatest quarterback in NFL history. The 2001-present Patriots are the greatest dynasty in NFL history. I will probably never see one QB-coach duo, or any one player in general, win 6 SBs again. I'd rather just let it run its course and accept it as a cool bit of history I'm watching than let it make me angry or feel like some atrocity has been inflicted upon the world because some sportsball team keeps winning. I remember being in middle school and getting uncontrollably angry when the 2008 Titans lost in the divisional round after such an amazing 10-0 start season. I felt cheated and outright hated human beings for the childish reason of their being professional athletes in a uniform I don't root for. Why would I want to fly off the handlebars like that over a game as an adult? Where's the entertainment or happiness in that? And to feel that way over a Pats dynasty that has had an unprecedented run of success? Not worth it. Life goes on. I'll just watch it until it ends and get to tell kids decades from now, "I watched it unfold, I was there, I'm a witness to sports history." Makes for a cool life novelty, if anything.
  7. I change my mind but not my special teams allegiance: #GostkowskiforMVP
  8. A football team winning a lot making you this upset is more detrimental to your life than the football team that wins a lot ever can be. The Patriots winning 6 super bowls ain't a crime against humanity.
  9. No! Shoo! Go away offense! No more points! Don't you know this is a special teams invitational! Sheesh.
  10. Blown calls? Garbage officiating? Lack of parity? Player safety controversies? Nah, all we gotta see to know how much of a farce this league is if the SBLIII:GYMSTI MVP ain't a special teams player.
  11. Super Bowl LIII: The Garo Yepremian Memorial Special Teams Invitational
  12. Regardless of who wins or final score: #JohnnyHekkerforMVP
  13. Don't have to worry about a comeback if nobody plays offense
  14. I heard they blew up the chicken man in Philly last night. Blew up his house, too. Geez, what a mess of a league.
  15. And thanks to a blatant no-call in New Orleans, we don't even get a consolation prize of a Brady vs Brees Super Bowl showdown. What a bummer, man.
  16. What was the point of changing the overtime rules again? Give both teams a chance with the ball and then it can be sudden death if nobody scores first go round, or it will always be too much of a coin-flip game of luck.
  17. Something tells me that wouldn't be roughing the passer if that was, I dunno, Blaine Gabbert or someone like that.
  18. When you hear it's gonna be Patriots-Rams in the Super Bowl: The Los Angeles Rams:
  19. Parkey walks into the tunnel amidst a sea of boos. The rage of a city that is no stranger to scapegoating roars upon him, then fades as he shuffles inside, his head hung low. A figure in a winged helmet approaches him, like a messenger of the Greco-Roman gods of old. "You know I can never show my face in Chicago again, right? I might not even get another offer to play again after this season. Is it worth what you promise me?" "It is worth it and more. You are ushering in a new era in our league, Cody. Last postseason was only the beginning. Your new life is worth every boink you've ever had the misfortune of kicking. I have you set up nice and neatly. A village in Vermont, witness protection secured, legal name change paperwork ready to file, living expenses covered for life. Who knows? Maybe your career isn't over. They may have an opening in Arizona, where careers go to pasture and die like aged derby horses. We'll see." "Alright. I guess I'm still on board. Let's go." With a handshake, the figure says, "You're making a wise choice, Mr Parkey. Welcome to the Foled." Meanwhile, in Foxboro, Tom Brady sits in a dark film room. Super Bowl LII is rolling on the screen for the thousandth time. Brady has poured over every frame backwards and forward. He will not let it go. His phone buzzes. It's a notification, simply reading: "FINAL: PHI 16, CHI 15" In a cold sweat, Brady sits in silence. The Philly Special play rolls on the screen.
  20. Titans fans would be like "McNair woulda played thru that in a playoff game! Cut Hurns now! He's made of glass and ain't got heart!!!!!"
  21. I've been having ethical quarrels with the brutal toll the sport of football takes on players' bodies and minds and well-being during and long after their playing years for a long time anyway, add to it with my waning interest in football in general to boot. Making the universal mistake of reading the comment section (particularly on the Titans Facebook page this case) has just kinda sealed it for me. Folks really out here blaming Mariota and calling him every name in the book for not playing (doctor/team's call, not his) when he's dealing with nerve and spine injuries that if not cared for right can do permanent damage. If losing a playoff spot (to get the privilege of getting stomped by a better team, and let's face it, the 2018 Titans are no playoff contender and just getting in would be a miraculous fluke) means a little less likelihood of reading something like "former QB Marcus Mariota now quadriplegic" in the news in 30 years or whatever, that's the better deal. Leaving it all on the field for your team as an athlete just ain't the same as destroying your body for someone else's entertainment.
  22. Sports make a select cluster of people a lot of money while the rest of us get to pay for TV or astronomical ticket and parking prices and chow down on $8 hot dogs with a $12 beer in our $150 jerseys to root for "the home team" and hope "we" get the win today. If folks wanna do that, groovy, heck I dabble in it (otherwise I wouldn't be on this post), humans are creatures who love things like sports and the drama and the "narratives" and the action going on, but it's a stretch to say a country loses when X team wins (unless you're Honduras and El Salvador in 1969). The Patriots could go 0-16 every year for 100 years starting next year and it's not gonna make a difference in the Universe except maybe some people will only make $50,000,000 instead of $100,000,000 because the team sucks real bad when it used to be real good. Numerous people in Browns, inc., made boatloads even as their franchise went 1-31 in two seasons. Dow Jones ain't crashing cause the Pats won tonight, brother.
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