dgnmrwrw Posted January 15, 2010 Share Posted January 15, 2010 It's a big improvement, and it's getting harder to describe what else it needs, which means it's getting very close. I hate to be so vague, but I'd say to keep playing with the highlights (adding some more, very conservatively), and find a way to add some more details, especially on the eye and around the beak. I think you just need some more black strokes to help break up the red, in a few well-chosen places. HURRICANES | PANTHERS | WHITE SOX | WOLFPACK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenfish13 Posted January 15, 2010 Author Share Posted January 15, 2010 EDIT: C Jay Z, cant believe it's been this long since anyones pointed it out dribbble Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJworks Posted January 15, 2010 Share Posted January 15, 2010 Looking better. have you tried making the beak a different color than the head? i think itll bring out more contrast Dribbble | Twitter | Facebook | Portfolio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaha32 Posted January 16, 2010 Share Posted January 16, 2010 I am enjoying watching the progression of this logo. that sure is one pissed off bird DesignsByHahn.com Behance Dribbble Instragram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MDC Posted January 16, 2010 Share Posted January 16, 2010 Unbelievable update, Cfish. keep working at it, its soooo close ---Owner of the NHA's Philadelphia Quakers, the UBA's Chicago Skyliners, and the CFA's Portland Beavers (2010 CFA2 Champions)--- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elliott Posted January 16, 2010 Share Posted January 16, 2010 I think the biggest problem with this logo is the script. The font looks generic (serpentine?), the black outline around it is probably too thick, and there appears to be much more negative black space to the left of the "c" than there is to the right of the "s". Also, the straight across script is somewhat lifeless to me, try some type of arcing, or left to right rise. The stacked design isn't too bad (cardinals on top of portland) but the team name is "Portland Cardinals", so if you could somehow differentiate a little more between the two wordmarks, like playing with some type of banner for the smaller "portland", it might help. Otherwise, I think that putting portland on top would look better. I think that the bird rendering is pretty good, but try opening the mouth a little more or thickening the black slash that implies the mouth opening, right now it looks like it can't make up its mind on whether to open or shut its mouth. I think the white highlights above the eye are really good. something about the lightning bolt like slashing detail coming up from the bottom bothers me, though, I'm not really sure what, but possibly tweak that. Dribbble ... Behance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenfish13 Posted January 17, 2010 Author Share Posted January 17, 2010 Thanks for the c and c guys, heres an update to the font, the only thing I can say is it may be a little to sci-fi. Let me know what you think: dribbble Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgnmrwrw Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 The logo is still improving and the new type is better, though it might be a little too sci-fi, as you mentioned. I'd keep looking at other typefaces as you keep developing the logo.As far as the logo goes, I think the general problem (which I wasn't able to put my finger on earlier) is the apparent smoothness of everything. You've got the spiky feathers at the tip of the head, but the rest of the sections of red are, more or less, very smooth. Take a look at this image, noting the way the individual feathers cause border of the red/black to be more jagged, while still maintaining a clear line.Also, I'm not sure why the yellow of the beak descends as it does, tapering to a point. I think it should probably be cut off. HURRICANES | PANTHERS | WHITE SOX | WOLFPACK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rentz Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 I think the typeface would work if you changed the As to something a bit more conservative. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaha32 Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 i think the mouth isnt as good as it was. now it really looks like its barely open. almost a if it is mid-sentence or chirping. i liked the previous version better although elliot wasnt a fan. maybe he meant to make it more of a scowl. im not sure. i think the new wordmark area is too thin top to bottom. by adding portland below it (maybe in a banner or black arched box), between the the A to L, it could add some balance to the whole logo top to bottom. DesignsByHahn.com Behance Dribbble Instragram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJworks Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 I agree with elliot. But, I'd make the opening in the beak more definitive kinda like the Arizona Cardinals logo. I think itll look alot better that way. Dribbble | Twitter | Facebook | Portfolio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenfish13 Posted January 17, 2010 Author Share Posted January 17, 2010 Made some changes, not too sure about them, but ill let you guys pick away at it dribbble Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJworks Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 Not too bad. He looks angrier, but it also looks like he's grinding his teeth Dribbble | Twitter | Facebook | Portfolio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaha32 Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 its an improvement i think. the meanest mouth yet. lots of logs grind their teeth so i dont see that as a problem DesignsByHahn.com Behance Dribbble Instragram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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