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Philadelphia Independence


gordie_delini

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Some critiques:

1. The secondary is much to finely detailed to function as the cap logo. Those nine stripes will be not much thicker than a thread or two, and nine alternating threads of red and white in a thin strip will not look like a flag. They will just be pink. Same for the stars. Need another approach for the banner part of the cap logo. Maybe a red banner with no stripes? Three stripes? And the blue portion should probably be the full height of the banner. You need to take a look at your cap logo in the scale it would be on a cap, about 2.25" tall. Print it out at that size, then stand six feet away and see if you can count the stripes and see the points on the stars.

2. This is purely aesthetic, but the way the banner bends back with a sharp angle on the cap logo doesn't work for me. If you got a long, streaming banner and folded it back on itself, it wouldn't actually look anything like your logo. I'd rather see something more literally accurate or a less literal, better shaped banner that looks more like a P.

3. Your jersey lettering is too small. The letters are badly proportioned for long words like Philadelphia and Independence. For long words, you need tall, thin letters. Scale your lettering up to real size and you'll find that the letters are no more than about 2" tall. That's just too small for a sports uniform. Stretch those letters out; they need to be at least two-thirds taller than they are now.

4. That Sunday uniform is very fine. Excellent approach for a solid-color jersey.

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Not to be an :censored:, but the secondary mark just rubs me wrong in so many ways (and not the good kind of wrong where it feels good). The flag is way out of proportion lengthwise, and it is way too angular as well. Flags are supposed to be wavy, with curves. I like the concept behind the secondary mark, but the execution is way off. It can be done better and I know you can do it. Also you tend to use a lot of fine lines in your logos. Those actually tend to detract from the logo. Beef up the highlights and shadows and you will find that it looks better overall and is a much easier logo to play with as far as different types of media to put it on.

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