2009 NFL Season Thread

[DEAD!]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

Where's the punchline?

[HedleyLamarr]

what did Jauron ever do that was noteworthy? The Bears had that one random 13-3 season in the early part of the decade, but did he accomplish anything outside of that?

Jauron probably on reflection was a very odd appointment, in much the same way that Mangini was a strange appointment in Cleveland. (Don't kill me for this next bit Bills and Browns fans) Neither had been able to achieve much of note at a potentially bigger franchise. I don't get why in those circumstances you don't choose between an untested rookie, who at least hasn't failed somewhere else, or someone who has had real success somewhere else. (Broncos fans for instance might bring up Mike Shanahan and his spell at the Raiders at this stage, but being fired by Al Davis is a whole other matter!!)

Two reasons:

1. Experienced successful coaches simply cost more money. Some owners don't want to spend a ton of money for a head coach and his new staff.

2. Experienced successful coaches want more power. Inexperienced head coaching candidates bring little leverage to the power department, whereas the experienced want more say in who gets drafted, who gets signed, who gets cut, and other duties that usually are determined by GM's.

[Saintsfan]

what did Jauron ever do that was noteworthy? The Bears had that one random 13-3 season in the early part of the decade, but did he accomplish anything outside of that?

Jauron probably on reflection was a very odd appointment, in much the same way that Mangini was a strange appointment in Cleveland. (Don't kill me for this next bit Bills and Browns fans) Neither had been able to achieve much of note at a potentially bigger franchise. I don't get why in those circumstances you don't choose between an untested rookie, who at least hasn't failed somewhere else, or someone who has had real success somewhere else. (Broncos fans for instance might bring up Mike Shanahan and his spell at the Raiders at this stage, but being fired by Al Davis is a whole other matter!!)

Two reasons:

1. Experienced successful coaches simply cost more money. Some owners don't want to spend a ton of money for a head coach and his new staff.

2. Experienced successful coaches want more power. Inexperienced head coaching candidates bring little leverage to the power department, whereas the experienced want more say in who gets drafted, who gets signed, who gets cut, and other duties that usually are determined by GM's.

I get why inexperienced guys get picked over succesful experienced guys, what I don't understand is why a guy like Jauron, whose had chances as a head coach, gets more chances when he hasn't been all that succesful in the past.

[infrared41]

Browns games are painful to watch.

5 offensive touchdowns in their last 15 games. How the hell did this team actually win a game? The Browns had a decent team two years ago....how did they become this terrible?

If you think it's bad just as an observer imagine what it's like for us Browns fans.

Anyone that can answer that question should send their resume to Randy Lerner.

Whatever happened to that protest they were trying to do last night? It looked like a packed house.

Lerner actually had a chat with a couple of the fans (the Dawg Pound guys, apparently). Heard them out for a while, and let them vent.

I thought that was pretty cool.

It was a very cool move by Lerner. Unfortunately the two guys he spoke with were total morons. It was embarrassing to see those yahoos "representing" Browns fans on TV all over Ohio.

[BlueSky]

Just read one of the funniest typos ever. In today's 'Saints Mailbag', a writer questioned Sean Payton's playcalling at the end of games. One of the lines in the response reads: "Payton mentioned this weed that he needs to evaluate his play-calling at the end of games."

I think they meant "week."

ETA: They've already corrected it.

[BigMac12]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

Where's the punchline?

You're supposed to put in a word for the *blank*.

[Saintsfan]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

BLANKS

Its all they can score after all!!

Only scored 6 points in their win!

[epper]

Note to Ralph: Please please please please hire Bill Cowher or Mike Shanahan.

Keep dreaming, Buffalo. In reality, it'll probably be some re-tread like Jim Haslett or Dennis Erickson.

HAH!

Shanahan contacted by Bills.

pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

[Saintsfan]

Note to Ralph: Please please please please hire Bill Cowher or Mike Shanahan.

Keep dreaming, Buffalo. In reality, it'll probably be some re-tread like Jim Haslett or Dennis Erickson.

HAH!

Shanahan contacted by Bills.

pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

2 things, one the story also mentioned Jim Haslett as a possibility.

But I love that the Buffalo Bills website is quoting ESPN on this story!

[rentz]

nooooooo ronnie brown

Prepare for 4-12.

[Sport]

Browns games are painful to watch.

5 offensive touchdowns in their last 15 games. How the hell did this team actually win a game? The Browns had a decent team two years ago....how did they become this terrible?

If you think it's bad just as an observer imagine what it's like for us Browns fans.

Anyone that can answer that question should send their resume to Randy Lerner.

Whatever happened to that protest they were trying to do last night? It looked like a packed house.

Lerner actually had a chat with a couple of the fans (the Dawg Pound guys, apparently). Heard them out for a while, and let them vent.

I thought that was pretty cool.

It was a very cool move by Lerner. Unfortunately the two guys he spoke with were total morons. It was embarrassing to see those yahoos "representing" Browns fans on TV all over Ohio.

which two fans was it? Was it the guy that dresses in full uniform with a bone on his head and that formerly fat guy with the dog mask?

[infrared41]

which two fans was it? Was it the guy that dresses in full uniform with a bone on his head and that formerly fat guy with the dog mask?

He was one of them. The other guy was some old dude. Those two clowns were on "All Bets Are Off" on STO and they came across like complete idiots. They kept referring to Lerner as "Randy" like they were his best friends and they'd known him forever. Lerner played those two morons like a 2 dollar banjo. They went from being pissed off to total apologists after they met with Lerner.

Meeting with them was a class act on Lerner's part but those fools were so star struck afterward that they just looked like schoolgirls with a crush. "Oh Randy is as upset as we are..." As I said, it was an embarrassment. Maybe not quite the embarrassment that "Big Dog" is but an embarrassment all the same. It's bad enough that our team sucks as bad as it does but now our fans are making us look like a bunch of idiots. I can't stress this enough; The Dawg Pound is not representative of all Browns fans. There's a reason we make those people sit there.

[Sport]

which two fans was it? Was it the guy that dresses in full uniform with a bone on his head and that formerly fat guy with the dog mask?

He was one of them. The other guy was some old dude. Those two clowns were on "All Bets Are Off" on STO and they came across like complete idiots. They kept referring to Lerner as "Randy" like they were his best friends and they'd known him forever. Lerner played those two morons like a 2 dollar banjo. They went from being pissed off to total apologists after they met with Lerner.

Meeting with them was a class act on Lerner's part but those fools were so star struck afterward that they just looked like schoolgirls with a crush. "Oh Randy is as upset as we are..." As I said, it was an embarrassment. Maybe not quite the embarrassment that "Big Dog" is but an embarrassment all the same. It's bad enough that our team sucks as bad as it does but now our fans are making us look like a bunch of idiots. I can't stress this enough; The Dawg Pound is not representative of all Browns fans. There's a reason we make those people sit there.

I gotcha. I understand completely about feeling represented by a bunch of dumbasses.

I actually watched All Bets are Off with Bruce Drennan yesterday. The guy is entertainingly annoying. He's got a certain charm about him, but I couldn't watch that show every day. And the people who call in are ridiculous. I watched it for a half hour. Every one of the callers were people calling in to complain that someone dealing with cleveland sports wouldn't do a phone interview with Bruce. The first call was about what a dick Randy Lerner is for not going on the show, then Sandy Alomar talked with him as he's the new Indians first base coach, then another caller saying what a class act Sandy Alomar is for doing the phone interview and what a class act Randy Lerner ins't for not doing a phone interview, then the next caller complained about how Bernie Kosar (WTF?) won't do a phone interview with Bruce, and then finally someone asked why they can't get Jim Tressell to do a phone interview. Maybe noone wants to go on All Bets are Off?

I think that Browns fans are struggling with something Bengals fans gave up on a long time ago. You have a crotchety penny pincher for an owner, the NFL is a business so the only way this guy is going to understand is if you hurt his business. Don't renew your season tickets, and don't buy the first round draft picks new jersey. Don't put money into the team and eventually he'll get the message or he'll sell the team to someone who does. But no, we're the Browns fans, we're too loyal to do that. Yeah? well enjoy ten more years of losing. Supporting mediocrity does your team no good when you have an owner like Randy Lerner or like Mike Brown.

[infrared41]

I actually watched All Bets are Off with Bruce Drennan yesterday. The guy is entertainingly annoying. He's got a certain charm about him, but I couldn't watch that show every day. And the people who call in are ridiculous. I watched it for a half hour. Every one of the callers were people calling in to complain that someone dealing with cleveland sports wouldn't do a phone interview with Bruce. The first call was about what a dick Randy Lerner is for not going on the show, then Sandy Alomar talked with him as he's the new Indians first base coach, then another caller saying what a class act Sandy Alomar is for doing the phone interview and what a class act Randy Lerner ins't for not doing a phone interview, then the next caller complained about how Bernie Kosar (WTF?) won't do a phone interview with Bruce, and then finally someone asked why they can't get Jim Tressell to do a phone interview. Maybe noone wants to go on All Bets are Off?

Exactly. I'm good for about 15-20 minutes of that show then I have to turn it off. Drennan I can handle. The callers are annoying as hell.

[Jigga]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

Where's the punchline?

The Browns are the punchline. Or they are the joke. Either way, I know I'm laughing at them.

[NJTank]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

Where's the punchline?

The Browns are the punchline. Or they are the joke. Either way, I know I'm laughing at them.

Ten things that are better to do then watching this game; 10) Tax Audit, 9) Root Canal, 8) Colonoscopy, 7) Raking the Leaves, 6) Body Waxing, 5) Walking on hot coals, 4) Being water boarded, 3) an afternoon with your in laws, 2) Help your wife at her Tupperware Party, 1) Swimming in Raw Sewage. Yes these teams are that bad and that unwatchable.

[Saintsfan]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

Where's the punchline?

The Browns are the punchline. Or they are the joke. Either way, I know I'm laughing at them.

Ten things that are better to do then watching this game; 10) Tax Audit, 9) Root Canal, 8) Colonoscopy, 7) Raking the Leaves, 6) Body Waxing, 5) Walking on hot coals, 4) Being water boarded, 3) an afternoon with your in laws, 2) Help your wife at her Tupperware Party, 1) Swimming in Raw Sewage. Yes these teams are that bad and that unwatchable.

Sorry Tank, but your audition for Letterman failed!!

[Cue obvious Letterman/coworker related jokes]

[infrared41]

Let's play NFL Match Game:

Host: "The Cleveland Browns offense is bad."

Crowd: "How bad is it?"

Host: "They're so bad, the changed their nicknames to the Cleveland *blank*s."

Where's the punchline?

The Browns are the punchline. Or they are the joke. Either way, I know I'm laughing at them.

My thought was the punch line was supposed to be calling them the "blanks" as in they never score any points. I also thought it was entirely not funny. Not because I'm a sensitive Browns fan but because the joke itself sucked. We can do better people.

Personally, I find the Browns hysterically funny. Has there ever been a franchise that is this far off the tracks? For a while I was seriously contemplating jumping ship but now it's like the worse it gets the more loyal I become. The day will come when the Browns will be Super Bowl contenders. The trick for us fans is to find a way to live to 180 so we can be alive to see it.

[Cujo]

nooooooo ronnie brown

Prepare for 4-12.

R.I.P. to the Wildcat.

(Thank goodness!)

[The_Admiral]

Don't renew your season tickets, and don't buy the first round draft picks new jersey. Don't put money into the team and eventually he'll get the message or he'll sell the team to someone who does. But no, we're the Browns fans, we're too loyal to do that. Yeah? well enjoy ten more years of losing.

This is a proven method of changing a team's fortunes, though not as intended.