CS85

I'd be surprised if there wasn't a snarky version of The Athletic with many of these cast off Deadspin, Sports On Earth, Onion/AV Club/etc writers to do their own thing. I'd subscribe, as I imagine would others.

This isn't too terribly specific, and thus may break the rules of the thread, but whatever. Basically every Bears season there's a game where the Bears look so inept and broken that I sit in silence for the better part of a day, wondering just why God decided to make me a fan of this dumpster fire. As I laid in bed brooding, my wife asked why I keep watching when it makes me so angry/sad/defeated, and I told her I didn't know, but I can't give up. I feel like there's a ton of non-Patriot/Golden State Warrior/LeBron fans out there where this moment happens annually (or several times a year). It's not exactly a singular moment so much as the realization that once again your lousy team is a fraud with zero chance to win a title.

That is the first knockoff I've seen that was 1:1 created from an MSPaint mockup.

Sounds like Sports Illustrated fired half their staff today and wants to convert to a crowd sourced super blog.

Foley's punishment will be dealing with a few awkward too-excited handshakes from MAGA-hat wearing 'hawks fans during the season. They read the hell out of that prepared statement. It was a more earnest, racial version of Artemi Panarin and Brian Campbell eating microwaved catering in a custodial closet. The Bears are, if nothing else, desperate and unwavering in their efforts to be simultaneously beloved and, when the moment calls for it, unremarkable. Fewer franchises I know fight harder to control narrative/spin that comes out of the building, at least ever since Aaron Kromer sold out Jay Cutler to Ian Rapaport at halftime. They are...better about not bungling things with the outside world these days, but they certainly have no idea how to be plausibly earnest with those PSA-type vids.

These names are a bit on the bland side, to say the least. Let's get more topical. Houston Roughnecks ICE Raiders PRIMARY LOGO: boot kicking in a door SECONDARY LOGO: infant holding a law degree COLORS: teardop blue, kevlar gray, power white Los Angeles Wildcats Cutthroats PRIMARY LOGO: a bloody corpse outlined in chalk SECONDARY LOGO: a small black glove on a huge hand COLORS: Nicole brown, conveniently black, handed red Dallas Renegades Snipers PRIMARY LOGO: a reticle SECONDARY LOGO: a magical bullet with starry, sparkly trail COLORS: Onassis pink, motorcade blue, conspiracy cerulean New York Guardians Brooklyn Bends PRIMARY LOGO: an old-timey, mud-spattered worker violently convulsing SECONDARY LOGO: a bridge with thumbs-up silhouettes on either side COLORS: Irishman green, dead Irishman pale green, granite boulder gray St. Louis BattleHawks Riot Breakers PRIMARY LOGO: an ominous armored vehicle with guns sticking out of portholes SECONDARY LOGO: white cops holding riot shields COLORS: anything but black Seattle Dragons Chair-Hoppers PRIMARY LOGO: caricature of Bill Gates SECONDARY LOGO: Blue Screen of Death COLORS: word blue, excel green, powerpoint red Tampa Bay Vipers Bath Salt Zombies PRIMARY LOGO: a hunched, Disney-fied zombie feasting on a chunk of brain SECONDARY LOGO: a dumpster fire COLORS: cocaine white, cerebellum pink, dimpled chad blue

I recall a few years back watching CSN Chicago and Aiyana Cristal was breaking down Bulls highlights and I thought to myself, "holy god, her breasts are absolutely enormous, like to the point of distraction - lovely distraction, but distraction nonetheless." I think this was maybe two weeks before Dan Bernstein made some dumb comments that echoed mine, which I admit were stupid, but there is something to be said about women in sports media being promoted/showcased for reasons that have little to nothing to do with their talent behind the camera or journalistic prowess. Quite the disparity from the admittedly, uh, homely looks of Susan Fornoff, whose book "Lady In The Locker Room" details how she did a sports beat in the 70s opened my eyes to the perspective of how women in media have to deal with egos, testosterone, and penises while simply trying to do their job well. I do think there are any number of women in sports media who carry the torch well, but will never reach the recognition they deserve because they don't provide the precum-drool that fuels any number of Barstool bros to type one-handed comments on youtube and twitter, getting exposed to some precious 5 Hour Energy and Geico ads to keep the wheel turning.

The blocky, generic kit they wear now is vibrant, timeless, and while the headspoon thing isn't great, I feel it's the Astros best look in many, many years.

I dig. I will always insist the White Sox are walking the tightrope between good and bad design; I just wish they'd fall over in one direction or the other, because the elements for each outcome are present.

I was totally looking at it wrong. Looked at the bottom as the new one.

All those uneven serifs...I dunno, something about that logo feels poorly done.

I listen to baseball games on the radio all the time. It's an amazing thing.

Yeah, way too busy. The colors are great, but too much crammed into this one.

Bung Hammers sucks but the branding is legitimately good! The stupid thing about the Pizza Rats is that they should've already done the full-on rebrand by now, what with the contest and such, but I guess there's legalities that held it up? That or maybe they chickened out and want this trial to push them over the edge.

I wish these teams would cease the gimmicky temporary nature and simply full-time rebrand. Bung Hammers, Creamies, Pizza Rats, etc - embrace it all 100% from top to bottom.

As a devout TMNT fan and appreciator of quality uniform/logo design, this is all wonderful.

Between the Creamies and the Bung Hammers, I wouldn't be surprised if we saw teams get temporary rebrands of "Hairy Banjos" and "Skin Flutes" here soon.

The hat logo feels like a shame, as it's a lot of detail lost on a small space, but the overall look is wonderful. Minor League Sports + Food Branding = Perfection.

Got a certificate warning from the board after updating Firefox to Quantum 60.0.2. Had to add a security exception.

You know some old-timer in the Phils' branding department was like, "Why don't we do this promotion: 'The Reading Cream Pies!'" and the entire office all looks at each other awkwardly. Some close tabs on their laptops and phones. Others raise eyebrows of sudden interest.

I feel like the best way to go about this would've been to put an actual wing logo onto a bottle of Hidden Valley.