JJSCOTT Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Working on a couple logo concepts for a local Jr. High that really has no current logos other than a typical spartan clip art kinda thing.Colors are black and gold. C&C to help me come up with some improvements would be great! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJworks Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 This looks really nice right now, but it's coming off more as an illustration than anything. I'd thinken up the outlines maybe 4 or 5 times more. Also, for that spartan head, could i see a version where it's just black, gold, and white (replacing vegas gold with black)?If you're planning to use all 3 marks, I'd keep the S's consistant. I see that a black S on the black spear is a bit of an issue, but a white/yellow outline on the S could probably fix it. Just a few minor issues here. Great work as always. Dribbble | Twitter | Facebook | Portfolio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcrosby Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 I agree, it's an illustration now. Simplify it, thicken up some lines and you've got a great logo. If this goes as well as the rest of your stuff I'm excited for the final result. https://twitter.com/OutOfThisWC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenfish13 Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 I agree it's more of an illustration, but it's a nice piece of work. I like the hidden S in the cape as well, nice touch. dribbble Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missouri tigers Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 There's too many shadows. Right now it's hard to tell what shade of yellow is actually a part of the schools color scheme. And, thickening the lines would really take it from looking like an illustration to being a great logo.I look forward to updates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJSCOTT Posted August 13, 2011 Author Share Posted August 13, 2011 Thanks guys appreciate the feedback... I'm really an illustrator by trade so that is something I feel I always struggle with makin the switch to logo forms. I should just learn to increase the lines a few more strokes than what I start with cause that seems to always be an issue for me when I work with logos.Took the advice and made some tweeks... really glad you guys suggested these cause I already like the look much better.Not sure if all three logos would be used but I wanted a few options. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaha32 Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 The updates are an improvement. You could even thicken up the black a bit more and still take out a little detail, but this is pretty good. The main thing for me is that it's kind of tall. You could also try to make the cloth flow a little smoother. But overall it's pretty solid. DesignsByHahn.com Behance Dribbble Instragram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missouri tigers Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Great update. The black shadowing affect helped so much. You've got a solid set of logos. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
9erssteve Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Good job simplifying the original version, it looks much better. But I'd say you could afford to simplify the plume on the helmet further. It's gonna sound kind hypocritical to say this having just said simplify it but you need to make the breaks in it bigger, but have less of them. Right now it seems to bity, when I think you need bolder but fewer details on it. Personally I'd think about losing the white highlights on the whole thing as well. If you're going with such a bright yellow the difference between the white and yellow, especially when viewed at a distance, is so negligable as to make it almost not worth the effort. If you wanna keep the white highlights then I'd recommend using a darker shade of yellow or even a proper bronze for as the main colour.Great job though and look forward to seeing this progress.9ersteve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vazquez Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Thanks guys appreciate the feedback... I'm really an illustrator by trade so that is something I feel I always struggle with makin the switch to logo forms. I should just learn to increase the lines a few more strokes than what I start with cause that seems to always be an issue for me when I work with logos.Took the advice and made some tweeks... really glad you guys suggested these cause I already like the look much better.Not sure if all three logos would be used but I wanted a few options.Honestly staring at this you could almost do away with the white, due to the intensity of the yellow in some players, the Plume like others have mentioned could be simplified even more... Behance | Clothing Line Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparkychewbarky Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 It's nice, but ya, you could simplify the plume.The "S" in the cape is cool. You could remove one of the yellow creases on the bottom of the cape and enlarge that "S".The bottom of the s could run down to the corner.Would it look crisper by taking the yellow keyline out of the S in the shield? (just have it black on white?)The improvements made are well done. This is looking real nice. *The Battle of Seattle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winghaz Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 I like these. But I keep seeing a $ sign with the spear going straight up. Maybe if it was at an angle? Besides that, great concepts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Somppi Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 that looks amazing... Auburn University Alum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moseph Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Awesome work man, it looks great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cooleyvol Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Middle one, IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJSCOTT Posted August 15, 2011 Author Share Posted August 15, 2011 Another update... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
9erssteve Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 Another update...If it were up to me I'd go with a fourth option where the highlights on everything that's metal are yellow and the highlights on everything that's not are white. It'll just make the whole thing easier to read with regards what's what, especially from a distance.Like the updates, but feel you could push the simplification of the plume even further without causing it to become unidentifiable.9erssteve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maverickwild Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 These are a good looking set of logos I agree the S cut in on the shoulder in a nice touch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandMooreArt Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Another update...now you've got it. i like the one on the left. GRAPHIC ARTIST BEHANCE / MEDIUM / DRIBBBLE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wILL-INI Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I think there might be too much yellow... Does that make sense. Like not thinning them down. But make them a little less prominent. Like on the helmet, especially the visor. The fan and coat look fine, I just would like a little less on the helmet... IMO "Classic" does not mean it gets a free pass for being bad design.Portfolio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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