Man makes series of 911 calls demanding return of Winnipeg Jets

[Milo Meningocele]

Man makes series of 911 calls demanding return of Winnipeg Jets

[CDixonDesign]

[NEW.ERA]

"If you?re coming to get me, can you bring me some smokes,"

Best!

[Mac the Knife]

"If you?re coming to get me, can you bring me some smokes,"

Best!

Yeah, this absolutely cracked me up.

On a more serious note though, I wonder why Jim Balsille hasn't just said "screw the NHL" and launched his own six-team league in Hamilton, Winnipeg, Quebec City, and other locations that would be clamoring for top-tier pro hockey? He has the money to absorb the kind of losses it would take to get such a venture off the ground... to me it'd seem like a no brainer - if you can't join 'em, BEAT 'EM!

[DelayedPenalty]

"If you’re coming to get me, can you bring me some smokes,"

Best!

Yeah, this absolutely cracked me up.

On a more serious note though, I wonder why Jim Balsille hasn't just said "screw the NHL" and launched his own six-team league in Hamilton, Winnipeg, Quebec City, and other locations that would be clamoring for top-tier pro hockey? He has the money to absorb the kind of losses it would take to get such a venture off the ground... to me it'd seem like a no brainer - if you can't join 'em, BEAT 'EM!

While it's a good thought, it has WHA2 written all over it. No one would take the league seriously, not even Canadians. Balsille's best option is to wait until Phoenix, Atlanta, Florida, and Nashville all go belly up simulatenously, and he steps forward with the proper protocol this time.

[NorthStar74]

That guy been chugging one too many beer that would be cold enough to freeze the brain.. geez what a phartball...

[TFoA]

"If you?re coming to get me, can you bring me some smokes,"

Best!

Yeah that guy was totally sober.

Can't wait for drunken phone calls from one Miami resident when the Panthers finally pack it all up in that U-Haul truck.

[Seadragon76]

I bet this guy is going to land himself on World's Dumbest with this one since they usually do stupid asnine 911 calls when they do World's Dumbest Criminals...

...Except this would be World's Dumbest Sports Fans

[The_Admiral]

All those foreign names from the old Jets must be so fun to drunkenly slur.

[njmeadowlanders]

Teppo Numminen is the devil!

[The_Admiral]

Count up the letter positions (A=1, B=2 . . . Z=26) in "Teppo Numminen" and it should come out to 173. Add his jersey number 27 to that and you get 200. If you write that in Roman numerals you get CC. What does CC stand for? Lots of things, hypothetically, but perhaps Corpus Christi, body of Christ? Christ was killed, betrayed by Judas, most likely possessed by Teppo Numminen.

[Sodboy13]

We need to get you a chalkboard, pronto.

Also, did Lee's wife post bail to get him out after this? Helluva honeymoon.

[oddball]

Count up the letter positions (A=1, B=2 . . . Z=26) in "Teppo Numminen" and it should come out to 173. Add his jersey number 27 to that and you get 200. If you write that in Roman numerals you get CC. What does CC stand for? Lots of things, hypothetically, but perhaps Corpus Christi, body of Christ? Christ was killed, betrayed by Judas, most likely possessed by Teppo Numminen.

You need to stop hanging out with Glenn Beck and Oliver Stone!

[BlueSky]

After being laid off from Delta in 2005 I got a 'survival job' as an emergency dispatcher (and I'm still there). You wouldn't believe the 911 calls we get. For example:

- Woman angry because she and her sister ordered some shoes online "like a really long time ago" and the shoes never came and she's "like afraid we got, like ripped off or whatever."

- Woman upset because she dropped her cell phone down a storm sewer. (Worse? We went and got it...)

- Man requesting local police respond and hunt down the coyotes he sees every day in the woodline behind his residence because the coyotes make it unsafe for his two-year-old granddaughter to play outside by herself.

- Woman requesting paramedics and an ambulance because her dog injured itself on a fence.

- Woman upset over receiving a speeding ticket and requesting detailed information on where traffic officers are allowed to park when watching for violations. When told dispatchers don't have that info, she stated she was "pretty sure it's illegal that you people don't know that." Oh crap, I'm going to jail!

Those last three? I personally answered those calls about a week ago and all 3 came in the first hour after we went on shift. That's when you know it's gonna be a great day.

911 is for imminent danger to life or property...not directions, not phone numbers, and definitely not because you're at the library to open it as a poll on election day but no one is there with a key. That was last Thursday.

My wife has said she wouldn't last an hour in this job before getting fired for telling somebody to f off.

[BBTV]

1 is for imminent danger to life or property...not directions, not phone numbers, and definitely not because you're at the library to open it as a poll on election day but no one is there with a key. That was last Thursday.

In Philadelphia, 911 is also used to report minor things like parking violations. If someone parks on the sidewalk in front of my house, I have to use 911 to get them ticketed (or take the law into my own hands... )

[BlueSky]

1 is for imminent danger to life or property...not directions, not phone numbers, and definitely not because you're at the library to open it as a poll on election day but no one is there with a key. That was last Thursday.

In Philadelphia, 911 is also used to report minor things like parking violations. If someone parks on the sidewalk in front of my house, I have to use 911 to get them ticketed (or take the law into my own hands... )

I really don't understand that. Fulton County (Atlanta) does the same thing, then when people complain about being on hold for 10 minutes while trying to report a house fire, the excuse is not enough manpower. News flash, Einsteins: quit telling people to call 911 for non-emergencies and you won't need so many people!

A solution to this is being rolled out in some areas: using 311 for reporting non-emergencies. Makes perfect sense because lots of people call 911 rather than looking up the non-emergency number or spending the $ to get it from 411.

[CDixonDesign]

A good friend of mine works in the Dispatch of our police dept. here, and while unemployed last year, I applied to work with him, and the EMS Dispatch, and while doing a "sit-in" as part of the application process, we had an elderly woman call in requesting an officer come out and "talk" with her because "she couldn't understand why the Devil wanted to come and live with her". Everytime we hang out he tells me more ridiculous stories...

[BBTV]

1 is for imminent danger to life or property...not directions, not phone numbers, and definitely not because you're at the library to open it as a poll on election day but no one is there with a key. That was last Thursday.

In Philadelphia, 911 is also used to report minor things like parking violations. If someone parks on the sidewalk in front of my house, I have to use 911 to get them ticketed (or take the law into my own hands... )

I really don't understand that. Fulton County (Atlanta) does the same thing, then when people complain about being on hold for 10 minutes while trying to report a house fire, the excuse is not enough manpower. News flash, Einsteins: quit telling people to call 911 for non-emergencies and you won't need so many people!

A solution to this is being rolled out in some areas: using 311 for reporting non-emergencies. Makes perfect sense because lots of people call 911 rather than looking up the non-emergency number or spending the $ to get it from 411.

We have 311. They still instructed me to call 911 the last time I needed a car ticketed.

http://www.phila.gov/pdfs/911v311.pdf

[Gothamite]

Guess because you were asking for a physical police response. 311 must not have that ability.

[BlueSky]

1 is for imminent danger to life or property...not directions, not phone numbers, and definitely not because you're at the library to open it as a poll on election day but no one is there with a key. That was last Thursday.

In Philadelphia, 911 is also used to report minor things like parking violations. If someone parks on the sidewalk in front of my house, I have to use 911 to get them ticketed (or take the law into my own hands... )

1 is for imminent danger to life or property...not directions, not phone numbers, and definitely not because you're at the library to open it as a poll on election day but no one is there with a key. That was last Thursday.

In Philadelphia, 911 is also used to report minor things like parking violations. If someone parks on the sidewalk in front of my house, I have to use 911 to get them ticketed (or take the law into my own hands... )

I really don't understand that. Fulton County (Atlanta) does the same thing, then when people complain about being on hold for 10 minutes while trying to report a house fire, the excuse is not enough manpower. News flash, Einsteins: quit telling people to call 911 for non-emergencies and you won't need so many people!

A solution to this is being rolled out in some areas: using 311 for reporting non-emergencies. Makes perfect sense because lots of people call 911 rather than looking up the non-emergency number or spending the $ to get it from 411.

We have 311. They still instructed me to call 911 the last time I needed a car ticketed.

http://www.phila.gov/pdfs/911v311.pdf

By "they" do you mean the pdf you linked to? 'Cause it specifically says to call 911 to report parked cars that are blocking traffic. You didn't say what the case is by your house.

As for PD responding to 311 calls, odds are 311 and 911 go to the same place, but 911 rings in directly while 311 likely dumps callers into an automated system where sooner or later they'll get a person if necessary.