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Jay Mohr article on CNNSi...


Korkie

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I don't know how much I agree with him, but I found it entertaining and fun to read.

Jay Mohr Uniform Article

"The views expressed here are mine and do not reflect the official opinion of my employer or the organization through which the Internet was accessed."

Dr. Kelso: My son is a big baseball fan. Not so much playing it, but more the designing and sewing of uniforms.

Tyler: That's neat.

Dr. Kelso: No, it's not.

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After much pondering and deliberating, I have decided that if I owned an NFL franchise I would have the team wear all-black uniforms. The helmets would be all black with nothing on them. The colors would be the same on the road as at home. The name of the team would be The Volcanoes. Unless they went on a really long losing streak. Then it would be changed to the Black Hole.

What is he, five?

What's with the "would, would, would" grammar school writing style?

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After much pondering and deliberating, I have decided that if I owned an NFL franchise I would have the team wear all-black uniforms. The helmets would be all black with nothing on them. The colors would be the same on the road as at home. The name of the team would be The Volcanoes. Unless they went on a really long losing streak. Then it would be changed to the Black Hole.

Volcanos in all black? Come on, the opportunities for accents of red and orange would be awesome. Jay, do not get directly involved in a team. We don't need another Jerry Glanville or Pat Croce makeovers.

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Huh. Jay Mohr's getting work. Interesting. Guess there's hope for Max Kellerman.

Oh, and don't go on a three-paragraph jag about orange not belonging on a football uniform, and then rate the Bears as having one of the best unis in football, lest you immediately undercut what few shreds of credibility you had.

On 1/25/2013 at 1:53 PM, 'Atom said:

For all the bird de lis haters I think the bird de lis isnt supposed to be a pelican and a fleur de lis I think its just a fleur de lis with a pelicans head. Thats what it looks like to me. Also the flair around the tip of the beak is just flair that fleur de lis have sometimes source I am from NOLA.

PotD: 10/19/07, 08/25/08, 07/22/10, 08/13/10, 04/15/11, 05/19/11, 01/02/12, and 01/05/12.

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What a train wreck that collection of laundry is. The Cardinals wear red, obviously, because that is the color of the bird. Sadly, Cardinals are not scary -- neither the bird nor the team --  unless you have to coach them.

So... why are the uniforms terrible?

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Wow. Combine a poor man's Bill Simmons with a poor man's Paul Lukas and what you get is Jay Mohr. It's impossible to believe he was once on Saturday Night Live. Or, considering the show's current state, fitting that he was.

1 hour ago, ShutUpLutz! said:

and the drunken doodoobags jumping off the tops of SUV's/vans/RV's onto tables because, oh yeah, they are drunken drug abusing doodoobags

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I think you're all missing the boat. He appears to like the Ravens' unis (I think he meant "bad ass" and "scary" as compliments), so he obviously knows exactly what he is talking about.

Most Liked Content of the Day -- February 15, 2017, August 21, 2017, August 22, 2017     /////      Proud Winner of the CCSLC Post of the Day Award -- April 8, 2008

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After much discussion with the guys from Queer Eye, I have decided that the worst uniforms in the NFL belong to:

1. Seattle Seahawks: Nothing makes you want to play in the rain more than blue pants.

The unis aren't that bad. At least there's not 50 different kinds of yellow/gold (Saints!) or an overuse of black (Lions!). The only thing I'd change about the Seahawks' unis is to cease and desist using the monochrome scheme. It just doesn't look right.

White jersey + Blue pants = :)

Blue jersey + White pants = :)

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I think you're all missing the boat. He appears to like the Ravens' unis (I think he meant "bad ass" and "scary" as compliments), so he obviously knows exactly what he is talking about.

If you ask me, Mohr liking the Ravens unis is proof positive that he has no idea what he's talking about.

Jay should stick to stand-up, the occasional acting role, and calls to the jungle because his writing (regardless of his opinions) sucks.

 

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I think you're all missing the boat.  He appears to like the Ravens' unis (I think he meant "bad ass" and "scary" as compliments), so he obviously knows exactly what he is talking about.

If you ask me, Mohr liking the Ravens unis is proof positive that he has no idea what he's talking about.

Jay should stick to stand-up, the occasional acting role, and calls to the jungle because his writing (regardless of his opinions) sucks.

Is your bias based on your Ohio location? :P I suppose your hatred of the Browns' uniform is also "proof positive." :P

As for Jay Mohr's career, I think it peaked with his Christopher Walken imitation on SNL.

Most Liked Content of the Day -- February 15, 2017, August 21, 2017, August 22, 2017     /////      Proud Winner of the CCSLC Post of the Day Award -- April 8, 2008

Originator of the Upside Down Sarcasm Smilie -- November 1, 2005  🙃

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Homer!

Which one of us (assuming you mean me or infrared41)?

Most Liked Content of the Day -- February 15, 2017, August 21, 2017, August 22, 2017     /////      Proud Winner of the CCSLC Post of the Day Award -- April 8, 2008

Originator of the Upside Down Sarcasm Smilie -- November 1, 2005  🙃

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