Jump to content

Mizzou's Michael Sam comes out


McCall

Recommended Posts

I think the problem, McCall, is that too many people use the phrase "I only care about his work, not his personal life" as socially-acceptable code for "why does that dirty homosexual have to flaunt his dirty homosexual sex in my face?". As if hets like me don't "flaunt" our sexuality 24/7 with wedding rings and pictures of kids on our desks.

Not that you're intending that. At all. But that's often the subtext behind such a statement. Hard to separate that ugliness from someone who can say the same thing and mean it literally and without malice.

What you said is right on...I've been told, by a boss, "I don't care if someone is gay, but I don't really want to hear about it." That sounds nice (ish), but we are always hearing about how someone is straight..."my wife and I are going to Chicago next month", etc. If you are gay, then you have to give everyone the impression that you go home and sit in a room all evening. Not the best way to "fit in."

In fairness to McCall, someone else brought up the whole "now jerks are going to say 'who cares?'" thing. Ge could have let it go...it's sometimes the best way not to have a tangent. But someone else brought up a fight that did not yet exist and McCall's not the first one to call someone out for something like that. Yeah, people all over the internet will say "who cares" (in that insincere way that so many do), but why go after them before anyone has even crossed the line?

I guess my thought is, you don't have to come out, you just have to be. You post pictures of you and your partner on Facebook? Okay. You talk about your husband as a male the same way a female would? Great! The whole point of acceptance is to be treated the same way, yes? So why the need to advertise your sexual orientation like it is something different? Instead, just live your life like you are the contributing member of a society like you are.

But the "advertisement" is inherent in so many things we do. It would be nice to think that a guy like this could just put a picture of his boyfriend in his locker and teammates would say "who's that?" "My boyfriend Steve." "Oh." But we are not there yet. This is a big deal. It's something that someone in his position has to either 1) hide or 2) come out with. I suppose a third choice is to let rumors swirl around...but if he does not want to be the subject of nationwide whispering, his hand will be forced to do something public anyway.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

If this man, a projected 3-5 rounder isn't drafted, I'm giving up on sports.

I won't give up on sports, but if he goes undrafted, it just might be enough to end my already shaky relationship with the NFL.

I'm rooting for this kid. He'd look good in a Packers uniform (and God knows they need the help on defense.) Here's hoping he has a long career in the NFL. Good for you, Michael Sam.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think the problem, McCall, is that too many people use the phrase "I only care about his work, not his personal life" as socially-acceptable code for "why does that dirty homosexual have to flaunt his dirty homosexual sex in my face?". As if hets like me don't "flaunt" our sexuality 24/7 with wedding rings and pictures of kids on our desks.

Not that you're intending that. At all. But that's often the subtext behind such a statement. Hard to separate that ugliness from someone who can say the same thing and mean it literally and without malice.

What you said is right on...I've been told, by a boss, "I don't care if someone is gay, but I don't really want to hear about it." That sounds nice (ish), but we are always hearing about how someone is straight..."my wife and I are going to Chicago next month", etc. If you are gay, then you have to give everyone the impression that you go home and sit in a room all evening. Not the best way to "fit in."

In fairness to McCall, someone else brought up the whole "now jerks are going to say 'who cares?'" thing. Ge could have let it go...it's sometimes the best way not to have a tangent. But someone else brought up a fight that did not yet exist and McCall's not the first one to call someone out for something like that. Yeah, people all over the internet will say "who cares" (in that insincere way that so many do), but why go after them before anyone has even crossed the line?

I guess my thought is, you don't have to come out, you just have to be. You post pictures of you and your partner on Facebook? Okay. You talk about your husband as a male the same way a female would? Great! The whole point of acceptance is to be treated the same way, yes? So why the need to advertise your sexual orientation like it is something different? Instead, just live your life like you are the contributing member of a society like you are.

But the "advertisement" is inherent in so many things we do. It would be nice to think that a guy like this could just put a picture of his boyfriend in his locker and teammates would say "who's that?" "My boyfriend Steve." "Oh." But we are not there yet. This is a big deal. It's something that someone in his position has to either 1) hide or 2) come out with. I suppose a third choice is to let rumors swirl around...but if he does not want to be the subject of nationwide whispering, his hand will be forced to do something public anyway.

There's a wide spectrum between hiding and publicly coming out. Not a black and white issue, on either side.

I'm curious, how do you think that hypothetical conversation would play out?

Also, I find it interesting that you think that just because he is going to be in the NFL, he has to make a public declaration. Rumors swirl about people, famous or not, all the time. How you react to them determines what happens with those rumors.

Look, I support equal rights with my voting, my activism and my words. However, my path to the end goal we all want seems to go a different direction. It's not that people need to declare their orientation, it's that it shouldn't even be a concern in the first place.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I hadn't really heard Kerry Rhodes' name since he left New York for Arizona, but between the fact that he was graded to pretty solid marks in 2012, yeah, it would seem pretty screwed up that, somehow, no NFL team deemed him worthwhile to sign during this past season. Denver couldn't have found a use for Kerry Rhodes once Rahim Moore was ruled out for the rest of the season, really?

It's stuff like that which fuels my skepticism on such matters. It is wonderful for Michael Sam to have the courage to do this. I can't send enough plaudits in his direction. Personally, as I've said before, I have a hard time imaging that anything like this will become "mainstream" (for lack of better term) in any of our lifetimes, but that doesn't mean that awareness isn't good; it's very good. And it's also great to hear that his teammates and coaches did nothing but support Sam in when he announced it in August, too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How I meant it was that I don't judge a player based on his sexuality, whether for him or against him. It holds no factor. And I choose not to judge any other person by it either. Isn't that the goal? That's how I choose to do it now, not in the future. I really don't see him being gay as a big deal. If others do, that's up to them. I like him because he was an outstanding player from my favorite school who I would love to continue cheering for in the NFL on my favorite team if possible. I know he's a good person off the field and that's good enough for me. It only has the subtext because people, like illwauk apparently, still choose to see it that way rather than making sure of the intent first, which it seemed pretty clear from my post that it was not in a negative way.

It has the subtext because of things you've said here in the past regarding homosexuality. Am I to understand that your views have changed, and that you really don't have a problem with same-sex relationships?
When did I ever say otherwise? Or are you just assuming that since I'm a Conservative, that automatically means I'm against it?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

f4bef8f5-e3d3-401b-b163-5f0711c56600_zps

Some company.

Besides Lavalais, all first rounders.

Yeah but Michael Sam's undersized for an NFL DE which is why some believe he may be moved to OLB which is not an easy transition to make at that level.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

When it comes to stuff like this, the only thing I care about is if he can perform at a high level and be an asset to the team. His sexual orientation is his business, his life and I'm more interested in what he can do on the field. That said, I do understand why he would do this. I just see it as a sad statement of our society that we have not evolved enough to where someone can be openly gay and not have to worry about the backlash or it affecting their career.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When it comes to stuff like this, the only thing I care about is if he can perform at a high level and be an asset to the team. His sexual orientation is his business, his life and I'm more interested in what he can do on the field. That said, I do understand why he would do this. I just see it as a sad statement of our society that we have not evolved enough to where someone can be openly gay and not have to worry about the backlash or it affecting their career.

This. This is exactly how my comments were intended.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Maybe he should have waited until after the combine to go public, because all eyes will be on him, but either way hopefully somebody will give hima chance.

He told his teammates in August and word got out to the NFL shortly afterwards. They already knew. Plus this gets more attention for the cause than if he were to get drafted and then come out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think the problem, McCall, is that too many people use the phrase "I only care about his work, not his personal life" as socially-acceptable code for "why does that dirty homosexual have to flaunt his dirty homosexual sex in my face?". As if hets like me don't "flaunt" our sexuality 24/7 with wedding rings and pictures of kids on our desks.

Not that you're intending that. At all. But that's often the subtext behind such a statement. Hard to separate that ugliness from someone who can say the same thing and mean it literally and without malice.

What you said is right on...I've been told, by a boss, "I don't care if someone is gay, but I don't really want to hear about it." That sounds nice (ish), but we are always hearing about how someone is straight..."my wife and I are going to Chicago next month", etc. If you are gay, then you have to give everyone the impression that you go home and sit in a room all evening. Not the best way to "fit in."

In fairness to McCall, someone else brought up the whole "now jerks are going to say 'who cares?'" thing. Ge could have let it go...it's sometimes the best way not to have a tangent. But someone else brought up a fight that did not yet exist and McCall's not the first one to call someone out for something like that. Yeah, people all over the internet will say "who cares" (in that insincere way that so many do), but why go after them before anyone has even crossed the line?

I guess my thought is, you don't have to come out, you just have to be. You post pictures of you and your partner on Facebook? Okay. You talk about your husband as a male the same way a female would? Great! The whole point of acceptance is to be treated the same way, yes? So why the need to advertise your sexual orientation like it is something different? Instead, just live your life like you are the contributing member of a society like you are.

But the "advertisement" is inherent in so many things we do. It would be nice to think that a guy like this could just put a picture of his boyfriend in his locker and teammates would say "who's that?" "My boyfriend Steve." "Oh." But we are not there yet. This is a big deal. It's something that someone in his position has to either 1) hide or 2) come out with. I suppose a third choice is to let rumors swirl around...but if he does not want to be the subject of nationwide whispering, his hand will be forced to do something public anyway.

There's a wide spectrum between hiding and publicly coming out. Not a black and white issue, on either side.

I'm curious, how do you think that hypothetical conversation would play out?

Also, I find it interesting that you think that just because he is going to be in the NFL, he has to make a public declaration. Rumors swirl about people, famous or not, all the time. How you react to them determines what happens with those rumors.

Look, I support equal rights with my voting, my activism and my words. However, my path to the end goal we all want seems to go a different direction. It's not that people need to declare their orientation, it's that it shouldn't even be a concern in the first place.

I think we'll get there. The entertainment industry is basically there now, but for right now this is how it has to go because gay male athletes feeling comfortable enough to be who they are is still relatively new. Eventually it'll be treated like it's another character trait like being left handed or having brown eyes.

But there's been a lot of progress made in the last 12 months.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I guess my thought is, you don't have to come out, you just have to be. You post pictures of you and your partner on Facebook? Okay. You talk about your husband as a male the same way a female would? Great! The whole point of acceptance is to be treated the same way, yes? So why the need to advertise your sexual orientation like it is something different? Instead, just live your life like you are the contributing member of a society like you are.

Yeah, that would be nice.

Of course, we'd first need to live in a world where more than half the states don't have laws on their books prohibiting that very relationship. We'd have to build a country where people can't be fired just because they happen to be gay. A country where politicians aren't actively working to strip gay people of their rights. A country where political organizations aren't raising money by claiming gay people are lining up to rape children.

Once we get to the point where it really isn't a big deal if a person is gay, then we can start to say public figures should act as if it really isn't a big deal. Until then, it's both disingenuous and unfair to expect those gay public figures to pretend our country is already there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is huge. Good for Sam, he has been incredibly brave. He has taken many risks during this process and I'm happy for him. It could be easy for him to hide behind it but he told his team and didn't ask them to keep it a secret. They did anyway and they had one helluva year. No distractions. Pay attention NFL.

The story is he wanted to come out to the world now so he could own the narrative. Wanted to tell his own story and not be outed by someone with an agenda. Smart move and again very risky, but brave. I say it's risky because of how the NFL deals with distractions and how the perceived media circus from will happen. I hope he isn't kept off a team for that but who knows. We live in a world where people go crazy over a interracial couple in a Cheerios commercial, in 2013/14.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.



×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.