Manti T'eo & The Mystery of the Undead Girlfriend

[Lights Out]

I'm not sure where you're coming from. IF he was a closeted gay man making up a fake girlfriend and constantly talking up his relationship with her seems something he would do.

Why would he do that instead of repeating the usual "I've got a girlfriend, but I'm focused on football" platitudes when asked until reporters lose interest? If anything, blowing up a lie to this degree would almost make it easier for someone to out him, because his story was, in retrospect, unbelievably outrageous. Just seems like it would be a far more overcomplicated way of keeping things on the down low than just speaking in vague generalities like practically all other athletes.

[Still MIGHTY]

In the interest of accuracy, the "E" in ESPN doesn't stand for anything. It used to stand for "entertainment", but it doesn't anymore.

GOD I hate ever so much the idea that things just somehow stop standing for things. Enough of this Orwellian nonsense where we are to believe that entities are assigned sequences of letters that abbreviate nothing to signify everything once they have somehow transcended their original purpose. It's just a stupid cable TV convention more than anything, for now, god willing.

"FBI doesn't stand for anything anymore. While at one point, yes, our primary focus was to be a federal bureau that investigated things, we at FBI [not the FBI; this is important here] now feel that a series of dynamic paradigm shifts have actuated a reimagining of what we are. We've teamed with Burson-Marsteller to better communicate our changing role in a changing world, with our new slogan FBI: Federal, Beyond Investigations."

So, safe to assume you aren't a fan of the ECHL anymore?

(Editor's note: For those that don't know, the formerly-named East Coast Hockey League that combined with the West Coast Hockey League and now has teams in Bakersfield/Fresno/Stockton/Ontario, CA is just called the ECHL. The letters don't mean a damn thing. It's a real thing called "orphan initialism". See: 3M, AARP, AOL, BP, EPCOT, ESPN, KFC, NPR, PNC, SAT, Texas A&M, WWE, among others. None of these things officially means what the initials are for anymore.)

EDIT: and it seems my ECHL thunder (no pun intended, Stockton) has been taken from me.

[Rockstar Matt]

This is all very confusing.

I want to believe that T'eo met someone online, fell in love with that person, found out that the person wasn't real which subsequently left him feeling embarrassed and like a fool. That would be understandable.

But there are so many holes in his story. So many things that don't add up.

However, I think this theory could be plausible:

T'eo really did meet someone online and fell in love. Found out that person wasn't real and in order to avoid public humiliation, had his fake girlfriend die when his grandma died. Plus, he apparently loves attention so by running with this girlfriend story he got all of the added publicity he wanted.

Still sounds crazy but it could be possible. I've heard of other people doing far worse things to gain public attention.

Of course, he could have made everything up for the publicity. I wouldn't be surprised if that were true.

This is about the best spin you could put on it. Maybe he was fooled, figured it out and "killed her off". And then it got so out of control he just could not keep up with and and, having the unique difficulty of being in the public eye, just sort of found himself "stuck". Maybe the added publicity was not even his goal (though he did soak it up).

That's the best case scenario for his reputation: he was fooled and allowed his embarrassment to cloud his judgement.

I agree. I think that my theory is unlikely, but it's the best case scenario for T'eo.

Like I said, this is all very confusing.

[kajeet]

Has anyone else had enough of everyone rushing to proclaim Te'o as a closeted gay man? Um, pretty sure if that was true, he'd have done the absolute opposite of what he did (i.e. make up an outrageous story about his love life and pimp it incessantly to the media).

IMO, he just made up a sob story in order to increase his Heisman chances. Thankfully, he didn't end up winning.

Yea, that is messed up. I seen some comments saying because he's a big football player and because he wasn't with multiple gf's that that must mean he is gay.

[The_Admiral]

Anymore? Did I have some fugue state where I was passionately posting about the Wheeling Nailers?

[IceCap]

I'm also not so sure about people using the "we hate him because he lied, not because he's gay!" cop-out should Te'o turn out to be gay. I mean yeah, you'll have rubes who would say that, but so what? They weren't going to like a gay athlete anyway.

Rather, if Te'o does turn out to be gay, this could serve as a morality tale, both to gay athletes and society in general. For gay athletes the message would be "it's better to be open about who you are, because any lie you tell to cover it up will get exposed eventually." For society the message would be "stop shaming gay athletes to the point where making up a fake girlfriend and possibly dealing with the fallout from that is preferable to just being open about being gay."

I'm not sure where you're coming from. IF he was a closeted gay man making up a fake girlfriend and constantly talking up his relationship with her seems something he would do.

Why would he do that instead of repeating the usual "I've got a girlfriend, but I'm focused on football" platitudes when asked until reporters lose interest? If anything, blowing up a lie to this degree would almost make it easier for someone to out him, because his story was, in retrospect, unbelievably outrageous. Just seems like it would be a far more overcomplicated way of keeping things on the down low than just speaking in vague generalities like practically all other athletes.

Well yeah, that's true, but generally speaking I don't think this was that well thought out of a hoax (if the "secretly gay" theory turns out to be true). Rather, if this is the case of a fake beard, it was one lie that just got told over and over again, and he felt he had to keep escalating the story to keep up with it. After all it could have started as "I have a girlfriend in California." After Notre Dame starts winning week in and week out it's a problem, because hey, the media may want to talk to this girlfriend of the Irish's star player. So he kills her.

As someone else said (sorry I forget who) killing her gives an excuse for why he wouldn't want to date for a while, and having her die the same day as his grandmother meant that he didn't have to fake grief.

Not saying that's what happened, just that it's a possibility.

[Still MIGHTY]

Anymore? Did I have some fugue state where I was passionately posting about the Wheeling Nailers?

No, no. I was kind of just typing... I do miss the Long Beach Ice Dogs though

----

Honestly, I think these "he could be gay" discussions are diving a bit too far down the rabbit hole.

[kajeet]

Anymore? Did I have some fugue state where I was passionately posting about the Wheeling Nailers?

No, no. I was kind of just typing... I do miss the Long Beach Ice Dogs though

OT: Me too. I went to a game in '05 when my elementary school gave out free tickets.

[The_Admiral]

I'm also not so sure about people using the "we hate him because he lied, not because he's gay!" cop-out should Te'o turn out to be gay. I mean yeah, you'll have rubes who would say that, but so what? They weren't going to like a gay athlete anyway.

Rather, if Te'o does turn out to be gay, this could serve as a morality tale, both to gay athletes and society in general. For gay athletes the message would be "it's better to be open about who you are, because any lie you tell to cover it up will get exposed eventually." For society the message would be "stop shaming gay athletes to the point where making up a fake girlfriend and possibly dealing with the fallout from that is preferable to just being open about being gay."

Agree with all this. I'm sure it still can't be easy to be openly gay in a contemporary locker room, but anything has to be easier than this.

[dfwabel]

Pete Thamel and SI release the full transcript of his Te'o interview.

Exerpts (it's long, but great in terms of WTF comments):

TE'O: On April 28 [my girlfriend] got in a bad accident and was hit by a drunk driver. Ever since April 28 she's been in the hospital. She recovered from the accident but we were always wondering why some days she would be doing well and the next day she would be down in the dumps and complaining about pain in her back. It was then that we found out she had leukemia.

SI: Sorry to cut you off, just trying to get the timetable right.

TE'O: It was the beginning of July. She and I, man, we had this relationship where it was just amazing. With all that time on her hands in the hospital, she was never thinking about herself and what was hurting here. She was always thinking about others. She went on and wrote a letter to me before every game. Things that she would want me to know. So yeah.

SI: Did she send them to you?

TE'O: She had them all on her iPad and her family found [them]. Her family, what they would do is they would read it to me. And then they'll send it to me in a picture.

SI: You called them one day leading into each game?

TE'O: Yeah, I'll call and check up on them and see how they're doing, see how things are going. Just like I check in on my family at home.

SI: What day this week did they read you the letter?

TE'O: Friday. I checked in on Friday.

SI: How did you meet her?

TE'O: We met just, ummmm, just she knew my cousin. And kind of saw me there so. Just kind of regular.

SI: How long were you dating? I know that can be a complicated question.

TE'O: Oct. 15 was the official date. Of last year. I've known her for four years. So we've been friends.

SI: So you dated for about a year.

TE'O: Yeah.

SI: Just want to make sure I have her name right.

TE'O: Lennay Kekua.

SI: How do you want her to be remembered?

TE'O: Lennay was so special. Her relationship with the heavenly father was so strong. She's so humble, hard working. And her main thing was her family. Her family was everything to her. As long as she took care of her family. And as long as she knew that her relationship with our heavenly father was strong, she had faith that everyone would work out. With her it was just always loving God and her family. I was just blessed to be part of that.

SI: How old was she when she passed?

TE'O: She was 22.

SI: She has a Hawaiian sounding name. Is she from there?

TE'O: Her real name is actually Melelengei, but her friends couldn't say that so they just called her Lennay.

SI: What did she do?

TE'O: She actually just graduated from Stanford. She worked at Clark's Construction Company, I think. She replaced her dad after her dad passed.

SI: When did her dad pass?

TE'O: In October. She took that mantle for him.

SI: Does the family own a construction business?

TE'O: No. But they're part of the whole administration, the higher-ups. Their family worked really hard and worked their way up. She's very smart, very smart and very intellectual. She worked there but her main dream was to work with kids. She traveled all around. She taught at elementary schools. She flew to New Zealand to just work with kids. That's what she loved to do, work with children.

SI: What did she study?

TE'O: She graduated in 2011 or 2010. 2011.

SI: What was her major?

TE'O: Her major was in English and something. I'll double check.

SI: I can call Stanford and check. They have to have some record or note that she passed.

SI: So long distance relationship?

TE'O: She was supposed to come [to visit me at Notre Dame]. She was just cleared to come to the Wake Forest game, my senior game. It was mainly just on the phone, every day.

[NJTank]

Can an Oprah sit down be the only resolution

[rams80]

If ESPN PR guy Josh Krulewitz is to be believed they knew of the story but were in the process of vetting it and were not ready to go public with it yet.

And ESPN has never gone off half-cocked with poorly-sourced and vetted stories before.

ESPN hid this out of selfishness so they could have a 'feel-good' story going into the BCS championship for ratings. Typical espn.

Or maybe the fact that if they were wrong, they could be sued for millions. They probably wanted to make sure it was ALL correct before releasing.

But hey, just hate ESPN, that works too.

It's damn hard to make libel stick in this country. New York Times Co. v. Sullivan saw to that.

[Evil Doctor]

As a completely unbiased observer that doesn't follow NCAA sports at all and until a couple of hours ago never heard of Manti Te'o, I can say with complete confidence that he totally made up his girlfriend...

...and going to enjoy watching this monkey dance....

[rams80]

After Notre Dame starts winning week in and week out it's a problem, because hey, the media may want to talk to this girlfriend of the Irish's star player. So he kills her.

Well, Brent Musburger does need somebody to ogle.

[kajeet]

After Notre Dame starts winning week in and week out it's a problem, because hey, the media may want to talk to this girlfriend of the Irish's star player. So he kills her.

Well, Brent Musburger does need somebody to ogle.

Speaking of Musburger, at the time, there was an article about the whole him "giving compliments" thing when the camera went to the stands and one of the comments said "The cameraman tried to locate T'eo's girlfriend in the stands, but couldnt find her". It was mean at the time but sure is ironic now.

[DG_ThenNowForever]

I don't think the concept is so foreign that a hard-working football player would prefer the reduced pressures of an online, long-distance romance to a personal, day-to-day one in the face of daily practices, travel, media commitments and so on. I could see how a digital romance could work better for something like that. Not saying I'd prefer it, but I get it.

No comment on the rest though, although I wish we could dissect actual issues of actual importance as critically as we do things like this. Just saying.

[The_Admiral]

I don't think the concept is so foreign that a hard-working football player would prefer the reduced pressures of an online, long-distance romance to a personal, day-to-day one in the face of daily practices, travel, media commitments and so on.

I do. These are guys in their early twenties with even more testosterone coursing through them than normal. The world is at their disposal and they're just gonna jerk off to twitter messages?

[DG_ThenNowForever]

I don't think the concept is so foreign that a hard-working football player would prefer the reduced pressures of an online, long-distance romance to a personal, day-to-day one in the face of daily practices, travel, media commitments and so on.

I do. These are guys in their early twenties with even more testosterone coursing through them than normal. The world is at their disposal and they're just gonna jerk off to twitter messages?

Maybe he really likes football. I mean, really likes it.

[Sodboy13]

I don't think the concept is so foreign that a hard-working football player would prefer the reduced pressures of an online, long-distance romance to a personal, day-to-day one in the face of daily practices, travel, media commitments and so on.

I do. These are guys in their early twenties with even more testosterone coursing through them than normal. The world is at their disposal and they're just gonna jerk off to twitter messages?

Well, anonymous teammates are now saying Manti was not unfamiliar with the girls on campus. That was one of the reasons some was uncomfortable with the Dead Girlfriend Heisman Push: real or not, Manti didn't seem *that* in love with Lennay to them.

[Mings]

Don't worry baby, I made her up to win a Heisman. Lets play just the tip.